We are all aware that Ryan Gosling was once a member of the Mickey Mouse Club, and though he’s since described the gig as “depressing,” there were apparent perks… and we’re not just talking about hanging out with Britney and Justin.
No, as it turns out, during his time in the Mouse House, Gosling also nearly became a member of the Backstreet Boys, since he lived in the same Orlando apartment complex as A.J. McLean, and used to hang around with him when the group was first forming. Sadly, this never came to pass (Nick Carter probably does not agree with this assessment) though we couldn’t help pondering what might have been — would he have worn sleeves? — so we’ve created an alternate reality in which the Gos actually joined BSB… what can we say? We’re dreamers.
» After several tense meetings, the band’s self-titled debut is renamed Blue Valentine, is way more depressing than anyone could have imagined.
» The video for “As Long As You Love Me” turns into Gosling’s de facto audition tape for “The Notebook,” including a scene where he and Kevin Richardson kiss in a downpour. Brian Littrell looks on dejectedly.
» Gosling gets Lou Pearlman one of those awesome jackets from “Drive.”
» Backstreet’s rivalry with ‘N Sync is taken to another level, as Gosling claims he based his drug-abusing character in “Half Nelson” on Joey Fatone.
» His abs in “Crazy, Stupid, Love” get their own solo album, much to the dismay of Howie Dorough, who had really been nailing the P90X sessions.
» The “Everybody (Backstreet’s Back)” video is made even more ridiculous when Gosling decides to dress up as his character from “Lars and the Real Girl.”
» BSB’s Millennium is a massive success, thanks in no small part to the inclusion of Gosling’s acoustic ballad “Hey Girl.”
» “Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely” is used to promote Gosling’s film “The Ides of March,” even though everyone knows “Spanish Eyes” would have been a better fit.
» Dead Man’s Bones serve as the opening act on Backstreet’s Black & Blue tour, inexplicably land a video on “TRL.”
» Gosling insists on singing all his parts on “I Want It That Way” in that goofy “Gangster Squad” voice.
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